I've been reading this book Fresh-Brewed Life by Nicole Johnson. Last night as I began reading this quote struck me.
"And the day came when the risk (it took) to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." -Anais Nin
So, it got me thinking about life and how real I've been with myself and God. Let me just say...I've been hiding. You know how you finally take a minute to breath and that little voice inside you gets your attention? He finally got me to listen for a few minutes last night and answer the questions that I've come to hate and love all at the same time. "Are you making a difference?" I've come to hate that question because it usually gets my attention when I'm not doing anything worth while. I don't think I'm making a difference and I don't think I've been investing my life in things that matter. Ouch, that's pretty painful to admit and express. I usually spend the whole day just thinking about what I want to and just being selfish. Oh, sure, I have my minutes and maybe even a day or two when I think about the lost and the hungry but those are few and far between. I'd hate to meet my Savior face to face and not be able to tell Him how I loved and served Him. But here's the beautiful flip side to that questions...the part that I love...it gets me to a point where I actually do something worthwhile. I finally "start over" again and seek His face. And you know what's the greatest part? He meets me there every time with open arms ready to teach me how to live for Him and be a part of His story.
3 comments:
A great reminder my friend. It's so easy to become so involved in yourself and your problems, joys, etc...it's the comfortable way. I think that's why it's called "dying to self"...dying is usually associated with something that is painful, but in the end is so rewarding.
Was thinking on this myself today, as I sat alone in the quiet of dawn. In 1 Kings 18, Elijah asks the people a serious question...
"How long will you go limping with two different opinions? If the LORD is God, follow him: but if Baal, then follow him."
Seems the question we all face is who you gonna follow? And Jesus is now, as he was at first arrival, inviting us... Follow me, for I am gentle and humble of heart... And, as you imply, if we do so, we will not miss out on making a difference.
Such thoughtful comments . . . Thank you.
The Lord provides mercies anew every morning because we usually need them -- having relied on ourselves and fallen into sin again each day.
Only with the new mercies can we die to self DAILY.
My "self" seems to healthy and vibrant at times; it doesn't die easily.
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